Since I could remember, sneakers made my heart beat. As a kid I would sneak into my brothers closet just so that I could put on his cool basketball jerseys and sneakers. As soon I was able to get my hands on money, I was on a strict schedule planning out which one I was going to buy.

But here I am now, 27 years old. I always swore I wouldn't be one of those girls who sold all her sneakers because she wanted to "grow up." Ultimately, I guess I never really understood what that meant. And at the same time I'm totally torn writing this article admitting how old I am and how age simply changes some of us. I've decided to go back to college, and I've stopped hosting DXC. Two drastic changes for me. 

Now, it's not that I've lost my love for sneakers. Let's be clear on that. I'm still one of those I like sneakers type of girls. But as cliche as it is to say, "the game ain't the same anymore" - take that how you want. Even me working at a sneaker store, completing a 365 of sneakers, having 16k followers on IG... still have a extremely hard time getting my hands on certain shoes.


While you can argue that I'm "spoiled" because I refuse to pay over retail and that is just how the game goes. You can also argue that at this point in my years on the scene, I simply don't need anymore shoes. Although I will always be the first to say "we can never own too many shoes."

I guess I'm just trying to justify and figure out how torn I actually feel when it comes to kicks. It's almost excruciating to try to win online raffles and don't even think you're going to beat the bots to any live link! 

How far is too far? How many shoes do we have sitting in our closet collecting dust before we say we're done? How much do we spend before we realize that our savings account would've been loaded?!

Most of the shoes I have are vintage, can't even be worn or they will break. It's that nostalgia connection. I'm older now, I stand on my feet all day. Let's be real - Jordan's aren't comfortable. Foamposites feel like 10lbs on your feet after a long day. But will I sell any of my Foamposites? That's like asking to give up a part of myself. Something I identified myself with for such a long time. Penny's have always been my thing. What happens if I sell them? Is it no longer my thing? Am I a trader now? Or even worse, a fake? The thought all together just stresses me out.


Yet, going back to where I mentioned how I feel torn. I can't remember the last time I wore a pair of Foams. WHY CAN'T I LET THEM GO?

Maybe I'm just being crazy and no one else has experience any of this. But it's been a while since I've posted and this was on my mind.



Share your thoughts with me. Let me know how you feel.